Have I have stopped smoking already? That question is still in my mind all the times. I remember stop smoking two years ago. I have been fully aware that it is difficult to completely stop smoking. Perhaps some of you also face same situation as me. Some others may stop because of health problems or in an environment where nobody is smoking. I remember when my father stopped smoking instantly when he learned his sons were starting to smoke. Several times, I decided to stop smoking but I could not. I remembered smoking one or two cigarettes with my friend years ago as I studied at a university.
Then I was interested in smoking more often when I was doing the student study service for several weeks. Besides delicious when smoking in cold weather, I also used cigarettes when meeting with local residents during the service. I identified myself as a social smoker. I chatted with the locals and always offered them cigarettes. Relationships get closer when chatting while smoking. Since then, I had been smoking a lot.
Sometimes passed by, the work required many meetings with people in the villages or refugee camps. At each visit, I always carried cigarettes. Sometimes when I wanted to get information from them, I invited to chat while smoking. Wherever I went, I brought cigarettes. In addition to accompany in chat with friends and people I served, cigarettes were also sometimes to repel silence for a moment.
During that time, I actually realized that cigarettes were not too tasty. If we stop for a while and then smoke again, we will feel bitter on the lips. But it was very difficult to stop smoking. Several times I tried to stop but a while later went to smoke.
Smoking is not good. When I go to hospitals, I notice effects of smoking. It was so scary indeed. I sometimes felt dizzy when I started smoking cigarettes, the breath becomes smelly, and I feel the cigarette content stimulates an unpleasant body odor. After smoking, I also had a habit of smelling my finger. Smell bad. The clothes I wore also smell even sometimes there is a small hole due to the floating embers. Afterwards I had to throw the cigarette put into the bin. If I did not find a trash can, I had to save it until I find it.
I still remember some types and brands of cigarettes I’ve ever smoked. I’ve ever smoked a kind of klobot, a cigarette that wrapped with corn skin. It was very heavy when smoked it. Next, it is sigaret (cigarette) and cerutu (cigar). Sigaret is a cigarette that wrapped with paper in the form of paper, while cerutu is a cigarette that wrapped with tobacco leaf. And from the brands, I’ve smoked branded cigarettes with variations of concoction, such as Djarum 76, Gudang Garam International, Gudang Garam Surya, Sampoerna Mild, Bentoel, LA Lights, Marlboro, 234, to self-blended. I could differentiate the tastes of those brands.
Again, despite being aware of the effects of smoking, I found it difficult to eliminate the habit. Until finally at one point, I did not feel like smoking anymore. Many things that affect to reach that point. I care more about myself. Also, I care about the people around me. It takes a long time when we already understand and finally enter the stage of consciousness to stop smoking completely.